Circumstances can create strange bedfellows. I’m still not sure just how I got into this, but I’ve been traveling with this hotheaded justice freak Misao, who wanted me to teach her the strongest attack in black magic, the Dragon Slave. This ended up releasing a whole mountainful of ghosts! Thanks to Misao, we managed to put things right and she’s given up on learning the Dragon Slave. I just hope that’s the last bit of trouble we’ll have… but I wouldn’t count on it.

The city of Seyruun may well have been the most beautiful in all the land. It was a city of peace and prosperity, with its great palace/temple complex towering above the rest of the town, a symbol of just, wise and holy rule. People thronged its streets. Food was abundant and cheap in the market. Here a puppet-show entertained a crowd of children. There an ox-cart heaped with farm-cured hams lumbered toward the butchers’ district.

Kenshin couldn’t believe his eyes. “This is Seyruun de gozaru ka?”

“Wow, there’s so much goin’ on!” Yahiko marveled.

“Of course there is!” Misao exclaimed proudly. “Seyruun is one of the greatest cities in the world!”

“I don’t mean to brag,” Okina went on, “but no other land has as much to do or is as safe to live in.”

“Wow, I believe you,” Yahiko continued to stare around with bug eyes. “Right, Kaoru?”

Kaoru ignored him, licking alternately from two confections-on-sticks she had bought from a nearby vendor.

“You’re gonna get fat, busu!” Yahiko jeered.

“Mind your own business!” Somehow, even though her hands were full, she still managed to whack him with her bokken.

“Well, can I have one?” he asked, undeterred.

“Nope.”

They weren’t unobserved. A tall, broad-shouldered man watched from the shadow of a nearby building. He wore a mauve haori and his long, straight black hair was held back by a paisley headband. “So that’s Kaoru Kamiya,” he murmured.

His companion was even taller, with spiky hair bound in a long strip of red cloth. An open white hanten displayed the bare, muscular chest and belly-wrapping of an experienced brawler. “And Kenshin Himura with her,” he growled and shifted the long, cloth-wrapped object he carried across his shoulders. “I’m looking forward to it.”

“Okay, Okina!” Kaoru called. “Let’s go to your place and eat, then go to…”

“You can’t just barge into the palace,” the old man protested.

“Oi, Kaoru! There’s a poster with your name on it.” Yahiko pointed at a nearby wall.

“Oro?” Kenshin blinked.

“A poster of Kaoru-san?” Misao’s eyes went wide.

“Oh, am I really that famous now?” Kaoru preened. “Let’s see… WHAT!?”

The poster showed an evilly-sneering Kaoru Kamiya, with the notice WANTED! 50,000 Yen Reward!

“What’s this?” Kaoru squawked.

“It really does look like you, Kaoru-dono,” Kenshin murmured.

“Excellent work,” Okina agreed.

“It must have been done by a really great artist,” enthused Misao.

Kaoru whacked all of them over the head with her bokken. “What part of that looks like me? This is a wanted poster!”

That’s right!” exclaimed Yahiko.

Kaoru’s poster wasn’t the only one on the wall. “There’s one for you too, Kenshin. And for Aoshi.”

“Orororo…”

Misao turned and glared hard at Kaoru. “Kaoru-san, what did you do?”

“The law can be merciful,” Okina added. “If you confess now…”

“I suspected from the beginning,” Misao went on. “Kaoru-san, you’re really a bad guy, aren’t you?”

“Hold on just a minute!” Kaoru protested. “Um, let’s see… I don’t think I’ve done anything bad in a while.”

“It takes you that long to figure it out?” Yahiko demanded.

“What do you mean by ‘in a while’?” asked Misao, still with the same suspicious glare.

“Oh, be quiet!” Kaoru snapped. “What about Kenshin? You can’t believe he’s done anything bad!”

Kenshin bowed his head. “Not… for a long time.” He sounded guilty.

Kenshin? Guilty?

“You see?” Kaoru went on. “But if we don’t do something about this fast…” There was a sound of running footsteps, and a squad of city police appeared… “then a bunch of guys like this are going to show up!”

The squad leader pointed his saber at Kaoru. “You criminal scum, Kaoru Kamiya! And you too, Kenshin Himura! You dare show yourselves before the police? We’ll make you pay for what you’ve done!”

“Oro?” Kenshin blinked. “Criminal scum?”

“If Kaoru-san really is a criminal, then it’s my duty to stop her!” Misao cried. She leaped over everyone’s heads and took up a stance in front of the policemen. “Kaoru Kamiya! And you, Kenshin Himura, as well! Even though we traveled together, now that you are exposed as criminal fiends, my duty to right wrongs and defend Justice cannot be ignored! With tears in my eyes I must fight you, even if you were my friends only this morning! I’d rather you surrendered quietly, otherwise… I shall right wrongs and triumph over evil – and that means you!”

“I’m afraid she’s serious, Kaoru-dono,” Kenshin murmured.

“You expect me to do something about it?” Kaoru squeaked.

“Enough talking!” snapped Misao. “Let’s get her, guys!”

The cops charged.

“Hey, call them off!” Kaoru screeched.

“Heh heh heh, I don’t think anyone can stop them now,” Okina cackled.

“Great,” Kaoru grumbled. “Looks like we’re going to have to run.”

“Oro?” Kenshin looked around. They were hemmed in by a forest of sabers, and nowhere to go but straight up.

“Okay!” cried Kaoru. “Oldie but goodie!”

LIGHTING!

The policemen cringed back, shielding their eyes from her bokken’s brilliant glow.

LEVITATION!

She grabbed Kenshin’s wrist with one hand and Yahiko’s with the other and shot straight up – only to smash into the stone arch over her head. “Ow!” she wailed and plummeted to the pavement. She pulled up at the last minute and they glided out of the archway.

“After them!” cried Misao. “To the ends of the earth! Evil must be judged!”

“Just don’t get hurt!” Okina cheered.

“I thought I was the leader!” the police captain wailed.

Out in the street, a dustcloud fight erupted. Kaoru and Yahiko emerged, rather the worse for wear. Kaoru was dragging a spiral-eyed Kenshin by the ponytail. “Just keep my reward for being your bodyguard waiting for me!” she told Okina.

“I see,” the prince answered. “Sorry the situation won’t let me defend you. But good luck to you anyway.”

“Never mind,” Kaoru sighed. “I’m just happy you’re not sending anyone else after us.”

“Kaoru-dono, more are coming de gozaru yo.” Kenshin indicated Misao, charging up the street at the head of another squad of police.

“See you later!” called Kaoru. “Bye bye!”

“Hey, wait up, busu!” Yahiko yelled, and followed her.

Kenshin took one look at the charging cops and decided that following Kaoru was the sensible thing to do.

“Hold it!” Misao screeched. “Come back here!”

Kaoru ducked into an alley and collapsed onto the stone curb. “Okay, we lost them!” she panted.

“Sou de gozaru yo,” Kenshin agreed.

“Looks like the princess flew off the handle again,” Yahiko grumbled.

“And we’ve got a price on our heads,” Yahiko pointed out.

“Kaoru-dono, more people will come after us de gozaru yo.”

“So what are we gonna do?” asked Yahiko.

“There’s only one thing to do,” Kaoru replied. “Find whoever’s offering the bounty on us and take care of him!”

Kenshin sighed. “Yare yare, just what to expect of Kaoru-dono. It’s probably a misunderstanding…”

They found themselves face to face with a band of toughs dressed in matching flame-edged hakama and vests. The vests bore a symbol on the back: a swastika inside a diamond. The leader licked purple-stained lips. “We’re the Hishimanji Gurentai!” he announced.

DIGGER BOLT!

Kaoru dusted off her hands and stuck her bokken back into her hakama ties. “If we keep beating these self-styled allies of justice, the big boss is sure to show up.”

“Was that the sixth batch?” Kaoru asked as she stepped over the latest bunch of crispy critters.

“I think it was the seventh,” Kenshin replied.

Kaoru sighed. “I was sure the big boss would have shown up by now.”

“Hey busu, what’s that?” asked Yahiko.

The street they were on opened into a small square. In the middle of the open space sat a metal cage. Its door was open, and a gleaming object hung from a rope inside. It looked like the kind of device used to live-trap animals for menageries.

Kaoru burst out laughing. “Do they really think Kaoru Kamiya is this stupid… huh?” The object hanging inside the cage caught her eye. “A unicorn’s horn…” she breathed.

“What’s so special about that?” asked Yahiko.

“It’s very powerful!” she snapped. “I could wish myself to be wealthy, or make myself look even more beautiful!”

“Why don’t ya start by makin’ yourself look like a real girl?” Yahiko jeered. “Or better yet, I’ll take it and wish to be as good a swordsman as Kenshin!”

“That won’t work!” She whacked him over the head. “Only a pure maiden can use the unicorn’s horn!”

“I guess that lets you out!” he scoffed.

“Just you wait, Yahiko Myoujin!” Kaoru marched into the cage and jerked on the horn. The movement released the catch holding the door open, and the bars slammed down, trapping her inside.

“Oh no!” she gasped.

“Kaoru-dono!” Kenshin exclaimed.

“What a moron,” Yahiko sweatdropped.

“Ohohohoho!” The window above the cage flew open. “I’ve caught you at last, Kaoru-san!” cried Misao.

“Misao?” Kaoru looked up through the bars.

Misao leaped gracefully out of the window – and smashed face-first into the top of the cage.

“Ouch,” Kaoru groaned in sympathy.

“That’s gonna leave a mark,” Yahiko muttered.

“Time to pay the piper!” Misao jumped down from the cage, undaunted by the scarlet stripes crossing her face. “And you too, Kenshin!”

A tall, spiky-haired man in white stepped out of the alley behind Misao. “Che,” he said to Kaoru. “I heard you were a mahoutsukai as well as a kenjutsuka to be reckoned with,” he said, “but you still fell for this lame-brained trap!”

“You’re the one who offered the bounty on us!” Kaoru retorted.

“As you say.” A second man stepped from the shadows. Shorter than the white-clad brawler, he wore an elegant mauve haori, and a paisley headband kept his long, straight black hair in order.

“Who are you de gozaru ka?” Kenshin demanded, his violet eyes narrowing dangerously.

The spike-haired man cracked his knuckles. “Name’s Sanosuke Sagara, fighter-for-hire. In the underworld I’m known as Zanza.”

His companion bowed. “Katsuhiro Tsukioka, artist and mahoutsukai. We will take you to Sairaag now.”

“Sairaag?” asked Kaoru.

“Someone there awaits you,” the mahoutsukai replied.

“You guys think we’ll just let you take us?” Yahiko gripped his shinai.

“Sou de gozaru yo.” Kenshin dropped into battoujutsu stance. His hand hovered over the hilt of his s akabatou.

“Feh,” Sanosuke snorted. “Better not try that, shrimp.”

“You will come quietly or this goes into the cage.” Katsuhiro gestured, and a sphere of violet-white light appeared in his hand. “There will be no escape for her.”

“Kaoru-dono…” Kenshin whispered in impotent, golden-eyed fury.

“Fine!” snapped Kaoru. “Do what you want.

Sanosuke laughed. So did Katsuhiro. And so did Misao.

“Lemme go, you jerk!” Kaoru screamed. “If you treat girls this way, the gods will curse you! You hear me?”

“Inside!” Katsuhiro gave her a rude shove and pushed her into a stone-walled cell, along with Kenshin and Yahiko.

“Hold it!” Kaoru snarled. “Why do I have to be wrapped up in this thing!” She indicated the chains that encased her from shoulder to ankle.

“’Cuz if you aren’t you’ll just make trouble, Jou-chan,” Sanosuke grinned.

“What did you say?” she sputtered, as Sanosuke closed the door. “Hold it! Hold it! I’ll show you what trouble is! I’ll take you apart!” She struggled in her chains. “Why did they have to wrap me up in this thing?” She slammed her body against the door.

“Sheesh, she’s just like a wild animal,” Yahiko muttered.

Sanosuke opened an observation slit in the door and peered through. “Just take it easy, Jou-chan.”

“No way!” Kaoru exploded. “If you think I’m going to take it easy like this, you’re dead wrong!” She managed to work her hands free.

Source of all power,
crimson fire burning bright,
FLARE...

The metal circlet around her head began to glow and give off flashes of light, which traveled along the chains, over her entire body. She screamed.

“Kaoru-dono!” Kenshin exclaimed.

Kaoru collapsed to the floor.

Sanosuke opened the observation slit again. “Oh, I guess I forgot to tell you. Don’t use any of your tricks or try to take that circlet off – it’ll give you a nasty shock if you do.”

“Like Son Goku?” asked Yahiko.

“Why didn’t you tell me that in the first place!” Kaoru squawked.

“Guess I forgot,” the tall fighter shrugged.

“Well get a better memory, rooster head!”

He sighed. “You better settle down for your own good, Jou-chan!”

Kaoru unwillingly subsided. “Ooh, I hate sarcastic men!”

Katsuhiro Tsukioka handed Misao a large sack of gold. “Here’s your reward for catching Himura and the Kamiya girl.”

“No, no,” she protested. “I couldn’t accept money for something I did in the name of Justice.”

Sanosuke came in, carrying Yahiko’s shinai, Kenshin’s sakabatou, and Kaoru’s bokken. “Che, that girl’s stubborn as a rock! Tried to escape right off! That circlet and chain you fixed up worked great, though, Katsu.”

“They just don’t know when to give up,” Misao sighed.

Kaoru continued to struggle with her chains. “It’s driving me crazy, not being able to pay that rooster head back. Oooh, he’s going to be so sorry!”

“There’s nothing we can do de gozaru yo,” Kenshin tried to soothe her. “He took my sword, and you can’t use your techniques.”

“Yes I can,” she replied.

“Oro?”

“But Kaoru, when you tried before…” Yahiko protested.

“I can use my techniques,” she repeated. “It’s just that I get a shock whenever I do.”

Kenshin blinked. “Isn’t that the same thing de gozaru ka?”

“Yeah,” Yahiko added. “What can you do?”

“Deal with it,” she answered.

Source of all power,

Electricity coursed through her body. She screamed; her back arched and she barely managed to stay upright, but she continued the incantation, though each syllable was a supreme effort.

Crimson... fire... burning... bright...

The ensorcelled chain glowed blue-white, then burst, unable to contain the power. Kaoru’s body looked like it too was going to fly apart; lightning danced over her skin and she jerked uncontrollably.

FLARE...

Kenshin and Yahiko dove for what little cover there was.

ARROW!

The entire tower, and even the cobblestones of the street outside, shook with the force of the blast. Incredibly, Kaoru was still on her feet. Sparks still crawled along the metal circlet and the shattered remnants of her chains. She picked up the lengths of metal and laughed, a low, mirthless chuckle that sent shivers up Yahiko’s spine.

“Kaoru-dono… daijoubu de gozaru ka?”

“It was nothing,” she grinned… but her voice shook a little, and she didn’t protest when Kenshin put a supporting arm around her.

“Uh… guys? The door’s open,” Yahiko pointed out.

“Sou de gozaru yo. Kaoru-dono?”

“Right! Let’s go!”

“What did those idiots do?” grumbled Sanosuke. He pounded down the tower steps, Katsu and Misao right behind, so close that they piled into him when he abruptly stopped.

Kaoru whirled the chains over her head and snapped them toward her captors, snaring their hands like a policeman’s man-catcher. She laughed again.

“What… what are you going to do?” Misao stammered.

“I’m going to do this.”

FLARE...

The circlet on Kaoru’s head flashed and sparked – and sent its magical lightning down the chain, into the bodies of the so-called agents of justice. They went down in a heap, and Kaoru collapsed in Kenshin’s arms.

“Kaoru-dono!” He scooped her up and rushed up the corridor.

“’Scuse me!” Yahiko managed to step on all three of their heads as he raced to catch up with Kenshin. “Feh. Might as well mess with Son Goku as with us.”

In the topmost chamber, they found their weapons. “Yokatta,” Kenshin breathed, finding that his sakabatou was undamaged. “Kaoru-dono, don’t move de gozaru yo.”

“What…”

Like steel lightning, Kenshin’s blade snapped out. Pieces of the binding circlet hit the floor with a metallic chime, and Kenshin resheathed his sword with a bright smile.

Kaoru stared at the shattered metal ring, and at the few strands of raven hair on the floor. So fast… “Kennnshiiinnn…” she snarled, “WARN ME BEFORE YOU DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT!” The force of her scream knocked him over backwards.

“Ororo…”

“Okay!” She picked up her bokken. “Now all we have to do is finish those guys off!” She led them out the window, to land on the pavement with a bone-jarring thud.

Sanosuke and Katsu were already there. “We’ve been waiting for you guys,” the tall fighter grinned.

“We’ll teach you to put a price on our heads!” snapped Kaoru.

“Like I care,” Sano sneered.

“Oh, just shut up!” She raised her bokken.

“I ain’t gonna fight ya, Jou-chan. That’s Katsu’s job. My business is with the redheaded shrimp over there.”

Kenshin looked around. “Oro? Sessha?”

“You see any other redheads around here? Sheesh!” Yahiko sputtered.

Katsu bowed to Kaoru. “The one you face is me.”

Sanosuke whipped the covering from the bundle he carried. It looked like a sword – but it was as tall as himself, many times more massive than Kenshin’s slender blade.

“What the hell’s that?” asked Yahiko.

Sano grinned. “Meet my other partner. It’s how I got my nickname – Sanosuke of the zanbatou, Zanza for short. It’s an antique from the chaos of a bygone age – hasn’t been sharpened since then, either. Can’t cut… but it’ll smash you to pieces.”

Kenshin drew his blade. “I am Kenshin Himura, a rurouni. This is the weapon I use.”

Sano snorted. “Yeah, well, you better throw out that stupid notion you got about not killing, otherwise you’re gonna die real quick!” He charged.

He’s fast, even carrying that huge thing! Yahiko thought.

Kenshin blocked Sano’s stroke with his saya and sprang into the air, catching Sano across the back with all the force of his falling body. Sano sprawled face-down on the cobblestones.

“That’s it!” Yahiko cheered. “That zanbatou’s big, but it don’t mean squat if it don’t connect! Kenshin wins hands down!”

Sanosuke picked himself up. “You’re about as strong as I expected.But a serious fight’s different from a practice match. The winner’s the last one standing!”

Kaoru and Katsu levitated themselves high over the palace.

FLARE ARROW!

Kaoru sent a fiery dart winging toward the mauve-clad mahoutsukai.

FREEZE ARROW!

Katsu countered with a canceling spell.

“And here I was thinking you were some third-rate excuse for a mahoutsukai,” Kaoru said. “Looks like you’ve got something!”

Katsu made no response.

Doesn’t fall for that, does he? Looks like I’ve got a cautious opponent here.

Misao, very much the worse for wear, was making her laborious way down the tower steps. She clung to the wall for support, but sheer determination kept her going.

Kaoru-san, how could you? she thought. To me, of all people?

Sounds of battle rose up from the street. She stuck her head out the window to see. “Get ‘em! Get ‘em!” she cheered. “Now it’s time for Justice to try its hand again!”

“Second round!” roared Sano. He struck – but Kenshin disappeared, only to turn up a second later perched on the zanbatou’s huge blade.

“The zanbatou is a huge, heavy weapon, so its attacks are limited. You only have two options: bringing the sword down or cutting across. They’re very easy to read. There won’t be a second round – this is the end!” He leaped forward, striking Sano in the shoulder. The zanbatou whipped around, but Kenshin had evaporated once again. “Since a single blow has no effect against you… Hiten Mitsurugi Ryuu – Ryuu Sou Sen!” The sakabatou struck from every direction at once, and Sanosuke went down under a rain of blows.

Kenshin sheathed his sword, looking down at the fighter’s motionless body. “Let’s end this meaningless fight. I don’t want to raise a sword against you – accept your defeat with grace.”

Sano began to laugh softly, and to Yahiko’s amazement, rose to his feet. “You’re the first guy who’s ever given me so much as a scratch,” he said. “Guess I gotta get serious, then!” He twirled the zanbatou over his head until it hummed. “HOWLING SWORD!” He brought the huge blade down in a tremendous smashing blow. Green energy erupted from the impact point. It caught Kenshin and flung him into the wall of the tower.

Sanosuke laughed. “This ain’t no ordinary zanbatou, it’s the demonic Howling Sword. Its roar alone can cut down any opponent, no matter how strong they are.”

“Sou de gozaru yo.” Kenshin picked himself up. “Then I shall fight seriously also.” He thumbed the catch on his sakabatou’s hilt. “Hikari yo!”

Sano’s eyes widened. “Che,” he breathed. “Is that really the Sword of Light? This oughtta be fun!”

“This is taking forever!” Kaoru gasped.

Katsu began his invocation, and her hands moved in answer.

“Kaoru Kamiya, nefarious villain!” Misao’s voice echoed around her.

“Huh?” Startled out of concentration, she looked up and spotted the princess, standing on top of the tower.

“If you continue to commit your crimes, then prepare to fight me as well!” Misao proclaimed.

Kaoru sweatdropped. “Misao, will you get a clue? They’re the bad guys! They made up all that stuff about us!”

Misao clapped her hands over her mouth. “But… but they said you were the bad guys!”

“Misao, think!” Who looks like a bad guy here? Look!”

Misao looked. She thought. She thought harder than she had ever thought in her life. She scowled and thought some more. Finally she said “Both of you look like bad guys!”

“MISAO!”

“You say one thing and they say something else!” the confused girl wailed.

Kaoru broke off the argument to cast another Flare Arrow and cancel out Katsu’s Freeze Arrow.

Misao continued to think. Kaoru or Katsuhiro? Which is the real bad guy? How can I be just? Then she brightened. Of course! Justice always triumphs, so whoever wins will be the good guy! She raised her hands.

Source of all power,
crimson fire burning bright,
let thy power gather within my hand!

“Hold it!” Kaoru screamed. “Misao!”

FIREBALL!

She cast the spell at the tower’s base, where Kenshin and Sanosuke were fighting. The flash and smoke could be seen well above the city walls, as the prison tower slowly toppled to the cobblestones below. Fortunately it missed the other towers in its collapse. Misao levitated herself out of harm’s way and perched on the ruins, grinning in self-satisfied triumph.

“Misao, you are a total nutcase!” Kaoru sputtered.

The girl was beyond hearing. “I knew it, Kaoru-san! You’re the good guy! I thought so all along!”

“That ain’t what you said before!” Yahiko grumbled as he pulled himself out of the rubble.

“Kaoru-dono, daijoubu de gozaru ka?” Kenshin burrowed up from between two blocks of stone.

And under the ruins, Sanosuke Sagara trembled with fury. “We’ll be back – just you guys wait!”

“So I guess we’re goin’ to Sairaag,” said Yahiko as the trio neared the city gates.

“Sou de gozaru yo,” Kenshin replied.

“If we don’t find out who’s behind those bounty hunters, we’ll never know what’s going on,” Kaoru explained. “Who are they? And what are they after?”

“That’s right!” The voice came from over their heads.

Kaoru looked up. “Misao?” The princess was perched on top of the gatehouse.

“What are you doin’ here?” Yahiko demanded.

“This whole thing has shown that evil’s on the move somewhere,” Misao went on, “and that it’s after you guys. So I’ll travel with you and crush this evil ambition! Isn’t that great?”

“She looks really serious de gozaru yo,” Kenshin whispered.

Kaoru turned around. “Misao, are you just trying to get out of town for a while because Okina found out you blew up the palace?”

Misao looked startled – then scared.

“Come back here, Misao!” Okina roared, somewhere behind them. “How can my own granddaughter do such a thing?”

“Uh-oh. Let’s go!” Misao grabbed Kenshin and Kaoru and raced through the gate.

“Hold on!” sputtered Kaoru. “Wait a second, Misao!”

“We’ve got to get out of here!” the princess wailed.

“Yare yare…” sighed Kenshin.

The last they heard from Seyruun was Okina’s irate bellow. “I don’t want to see you back here for a long time!”

“See you!” Kaoru yelled back at him. “We’re off to Sairaag! Take care of things till we get back!”

The road ahead beckoned, and a new adventure awaited. What more could anyone want?

NOTES, EXPLANATIONS ETC.

Hishimanji Gurentai: in keeping with my practice of replacing Slayers villains with RK ones wherever I think of it, here they are. I don’t recall if the anime showed their insignia or not, but “hishimanji” means “diamond swastika.” I probably should make a slight bow to political correctness and remind my readers that in Asia the swastika retains its original significance as a stylized solar wheel, and is therefore thought to be protective. Gurentai means something like “gang of fools” and they certainly are.

Since I had cast Sano in the role of Zangulus, I thought it appropriate to lift most of his fight with Kenshin out of the RK manga. The translations are Maigo-chan’s.